The first 26 years of my life were spent in northern Wisconsin.  The next 13 years were spent in Texas and Arizona.  So I've lived my life in the extremes of weather.  Cold as a witches ___ and hot as _____.  I can tell you with 100% certainty that the heat is better than the cold.

Now to be clear, I'm talking hot and cold.  Of course I'd rather have it sunny and 72 every day, but this isn't some fairytale land with magical weather elves.  No, this is the Midwest.  Heater on one day, AC on the next.  Let's roll through the top 10 reasons the heat is a better option every time.

1-Getting naked to stay cool is way more fun than putting on layers to stay warm.

Deagreez
Deagreez
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I mean do I need to explain this one to you?  I've seen "movies" of getting naked to cool off and it typically goes well.  I've never seen that level of fun when wearing long underwear, snow pants and a coat.

2-I've been stuck due to cold weather.  I've never been stuck due to the heat.

snowstorm
Irina Igumnova
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At no point during a heat wave do I have to check the conditions of the road and say "well I better not travel now cause I might get stuck".  Getting stuck in the car (which happened last year in the I-Rock truck...embarrassing af) or being stuck at home cause you can't go anywhere is another reason the cold is worse than the heat.

3-Have you ever slipped on the heat?

Townsquare Media Boise
Townsquare Media Boise
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This is the only kind of slipping I want to do in the summer.  I've never slipped cause it was hot out.  I've slipped, even when not drunk, on the ice thanks to the cold.

4-Beach and pool parties are more fun than ice fishing.

A naked man is sitting cross legged on an empty beach and meditating.
sylv1rob1
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Well, unless you are me then this is the best either of them get.

5-It takes 15 minutes just to get dressed to go outside in the cold.

The lower part of men's feet in white socks and sandals
Mykola Komarovskyy
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It takes me like 15 seconds to find my flip flops and walk outside.  By the time I'm done getting dressed to go out in the winter I'm exhausted.  And if you have kids, you know exactly what happens.  15 minutes to get them dressed and then "I need to go to the bathroom."  WTF!

6-Flowers, trees and grass look so much better than...well anything in the cold.

nathanphoto
nathanphoto
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That was the only plant picture I could find.  I swear.  I guess most of you grow that inside so it doesn't really count....but you get the point.

7-Grilling is better when it's hot out.

Beef steaks on the grill. copy space for your text
EvgeniiAnd
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Yeah I know, you can grill in the cold as well.  And I do too.  But, go back to point 5.  Getting dressed up to stand over a smoky grill sucks.  Your winter coat smells like smoke and it never really comes out.  You also know there is little to no chance that you will go back out there to clean it properly.  Plus let's be real, 95% of grilling is drinking while you grill.  Yes, you can grill and drink in the cold.  But a cold one in the summer is so much better than in the winter.

8-The cold hurts everything.

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Jupiterimages
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When you walk outside and take a deep inhale this weekend, it won't hurt.  Don't try that when it's January.  Like pins inside your lungs.  I can sit outside for 12 hours this weekend under a tree and be totally fine.  12 minutes in the cold and my body hurts.

9-Outdoor concerts are great.

The Gorge Ampthitheatre - George, Wash.
Jim Bennett, Getty Images
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I don't care if it's Metallica, Slipknot, Korn or some random band you've never heard of.  Watching live music outside is fantastic.  I love the hot and steamy festivals that you spend all day at.  I also love rolling up to a park and some random band is playing.  I'll grab me a drink and send the kid off to play in the playground.  That never happens in the cold.

10-All concerts are better in the summer.

Music fans attend a heavy metal concert at Luzhniki Stadium in Moscow on July 21, 2019.
Gavriil Grigorov, Getty Images
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All of them.  Every single one.  When you come to Sevendust on June 29 (concert plug!) you'll roll up in some shorts and a t-shirt ready to go.  In the winter?  Is it going to snow and be dangerous to drive?  Are you going to slip on the ice walking to the venue and break your leg?  Ok, that is probably more likely after the show when you've had some drinks.  Are you going to wear a coat or just "suck it up" and be cold?   At a show in Minneapolis in the dead of winter I was drenched in sweat from the pit and of course we didn't take in a coat.  On the walk back to the car, my shirt froze.  That sucked yo.

So just get naked, have a drink, go to a show and enjoy the heat.  Happy Summer!

LOOK: Here are the 50 best beach towns in America

Every beach town has its share of pluses and minuses, which got us thinking about what makes a beach town the best one to live in. To find out, Stacker consulted data from WalletHub, released June 17, 2020, that compares U.S. beach towns. Ratings are based on six categories: affordability, weather, safety, economy, education and health, and quality of life. The cities ranged in population from 10,000 to 150,000, but they had to have at least one local beach listed on TripAdvisor. Read the full methodology here. From those rankings, we selected the top 50. Readers who live in California and Florida will be unsurprised to learn that many of towns featured here are in one of those two states.

Keep reading to see if your favorite beach town made the cut.

 

 

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